I cannot even begin to explain the overwhelming feeling of drowning in the ocean that is called parenthood. Maybe it is because things work differently in our far-from-normal household. The way hubby and I do things around here is he gets the privilege of going to work every day, come home, eat dinner, maybe go do a bit of fishing, and be the Terminator when harsh discipline needs to be handed out when the boys don’t listen to me.
I take care of everything else. Yes, everything else, and wearing these hats is a bit daunting. I envy my husband is seemingly carefree life at times. Then I remember what it was like to be in his shoes – the only one working and bringing home a paycheck. I don’t know that I would trade places with him again.
My Mom Responsibilities
- Physician Assistant – schedule, calendar and remind for all doctor appointments
- Budget Planner – responsible for making every last penny stretch to the maximum
- Homework Monitor – make them do it, check it, and then check their Blackboard grades to ensure they turned it in
- Teacher Liason – School Conferences, IEP Meetings, Back to School Nights, Orientations, Spirit Days, Field Trips
- House Maid (without the cute little french maid outfit) – laundry, cleaning, dusting, vacuuming, cooking and more cleaning
- Family Pharmacist – ensure all medications are taken at the proper time and dosage
- Volunteer Mom – handle duties of the PTSA Membership for high school and Boosters Communications Officer for the middle school – and anywhere else I’m needed for the past three years
- Interior Designer – take care of keeping our home decor seasonal (as much as possible) and hope that nobody notices the fall flower arrangement that has been on the kitchen table since 2013
- Fashion Coordinator – ensuring that everyone has a perfectly coördinated wardrobe (except for hubby who has the pleasure of wearing a uniform every day) and matching footwear
- Personal Chaueffer – drive children to and from appointments, school activities and functions, drop-everything-you’re-doing person to carry them a different pair of sneakers because the ones they have on are hurting and they can’t possibly make it through the day if you don’t
- Head Chef – responsible for about three different meals per day in addition to multiple snacks and monitoring of said snacks and mini-meals (teenagers eat about 300x per day if you didn’t know)
- Chief Dog Walker and Groomer – because the dog that the kids wanted, promised that they would walk and groom and take care of gets a pat on the head when they are coming and going and that’s about it. Being a teeny dog with a huge appetite (I think she has teenager genes) she requires walking about 15 times a day. She also likes to find the smelliest pile of crap to roll in every day as well.
- Party Planner – October is the beginning of our party season and I get to spend the next six months planning birthday parties, Halloween parties, dog birthday parties, Christmas parties, Thanksgiving parties, New Year’s Eve parties and Valentine’s Day parties. This includes planning guest lists with just first names from the boys since it is an apparent “guy thing” that last names aren’t important.
- Police Officer – on those occasions when altercations between the boys ensue, when chores have not been done, homework has not been done, bedrooms have not been cleaned – I am the law and the jailer. If they don’t listen, I call in the Terminator (aka hubby) with the do-it-or-get-the-chair attitude.
- Activities Director – heaven knows you cannot possibly allow them to rely on their own devices to entertain themselves
- Part Time Leasing Consultant – when needed, I do double-duty as a fill-in leasing consultant at our apartment community
- Mom – there to comfort, cuddle, protect, chastise … listen to their stories, pretend to like their horrid music, laugh at their jokes, admire the individual personalities that they are becoming, help them realize their hopes and their dreams, steer them away from the wrong path and keep them on the right path. Love unconditionally.
I never feel as though I have any “down time” from being a parent. It is a 24 hours a day, 7 days a week job. I’ve made so many mistakes, but I’ve also done a lot of things that I’m proud of with them as well. It is an exhausting job … and I haven’t even taken into account the many hats that I wear as a blogging mom working from home.
What about you? How many hats do you wear each day as “just a mom” in your household?
People Who Tick Me Off
Want to know something that completely pisses me off? When I hear others saying, “she’s just a mom.” Just a mom? Do you have any frigging idea what moms do each day? Factor in that the more children you have, the more difficult your job as just a mom can be depending on their age. I want to smack the taste out of their mouth when I hear somebody say that. I’m not even going to start on those comments about being a work-at-home-mom.
So How Do You Fix It?
Do I know how to stop this drowning feeling? Nope. Not one bit. I will continue to make my lists so my overworked brain won’t forget anything. I will continue to deal with matters as they come up. I will drink the occasional
bottle glass of wine, have a bit of “me time” in the tub when things get too stressful, eat my chocolate, run on the treadmill at the gym when I feel like I need to run away from it all, but then …
I will continue to tread water and keep my head above the waves, simply because in the back of my mind I know that there are so many women out there who would give anything to be drowning in the ocean of parenthood but cannot for whatever reason. Those smiles and silly grins and their daily antics that have me grinning from ear-to-ear make it all worthwhile, and you couldn’t pay me to change my life, or go back in time before I became a parent.
Well, maybe for just a day or two it would be nice.