I am a firm believer that every human being needs to be treated with the same love, kindness, respect, and dignity that we expect to receive ourselves. Unfortunately, not everyone agrees with me. I also support the L.G.B.T.Q.I.A.+ community. EVERYONE deserves to be treated with love and kindness and that is something that should never, ever, EVER be withheld because you don’t agree with someone else’s thoughts, opinions, or preferences on how they portray themselves to the world. It’s all about EDUCATING YOURSELF for today’s world. If you are not sure what all those initials stand for, this is a great article that explains it all.
There are things people should understand when it comes to dating transsexual women. Get more information about transsexuals in this link. There are still some transwomen who say that they don’t get the respect or the treatment that they are looking for. Some feel that their dates may fancy them, but when it comes to respect, it’s always a frustrating experience.
A good rule of thumb is to treat all the women that you date with the same respect that you would give your mom. In the words of a transwoman, here are some of the things that you need to know to be successful in dating them.
They Are NOT a Novelty
Don’t treat your date as a fetish or a novelty. Know the reasons why you are dating transgenders. If you think of them as some kind of a fetish, they will not like it. Some men may just want to experience how it feels to date one. Unfortunately, some transgender women are looking for a real relationship. They don’t consider themselves as people who will fill other’s fantasies. They have feelings and just like when you are dating any other woman, you should acknowledge that they also need to be treated with respect.
They Have Different Bodies and Personalities
Never assume that a transwoman has the same body as the one you’ve previously dated with. Some take pills that boost their female hormones and limit their male hormones. This means that some of them may have big breasts and don’t have an Adam’s apple. Some hide their gender because they fear that they are going to be ostracized. So they retain their look but deep inside, they are feminine. They are not the same, so they should not be treated similarly.
Don’t Ask them Rude Questions
If they have undergone a transplant or operation, don’t ask them about the process. It is rude to know how they undergo different body changes. Besides, you are on a date so don’t treat them like a search engine where you ask for information! If you want to know about transplants or pills, do your own research on the internet.
Talk to them Like a Woman
You should treat them how you would treat any other woman. Talk to them about yourself. Ask them normal questions such as their favorite hobbies or food. If you are the traditional type of man, you should still open doors for them or pick up the tab during a date. They will appreciate it if you know how to make them feel that they have a successful transformation as a cissexual. Know more about cissexual in this site: https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/cissexual.
Gender and Sex Are Two Different Things
Don’t doubt your sexuality when dating a transwoman. Your gender and sexuality are different. Sex is the male or female designation you were born with. Gender is what you identify yourself as when you are growing up. It does not mean that when you are dating someone who is trans, you are not straight anymore. You’re still you and you are attracted to a woman so treat her like one. Don’t make statements such as you are beginning to doubt yourself because you are dating a transwoman. That is not the case, and you should never say that to your date!
Don’t Hide Them
Keeping them a secret will hurt their feelings, much in the same way it would hurt anyone’s feelings. Although society has long accepted them, there are still some with small minds who may judge them because of ingrained stigmas. If you are exclusively dating a transwoman, be proud of her! At some point, you will need to introduce them to your friends and family. It is disrespectful to hide them. They deserve to be showed off.
Don’t Try Compliments that won’t Go Well
When it’s your first time dating a transwoman, don’t compliment them with words such as “you don’t look like trans”, or “no one could guess that you are a transwoman.” It is insulting. They do not want to be treated differently. They are women and they are not trying to scam someone. That is what they feel and it should be respected.
They Fear Rejection
Regardless if you have found them on the best transgender dating sites for free or if they were introduced by a common friend, they still fear rejection. Every human being fears being rejected, but the feeling can be twice as bad for them. If they are rejected, they might simply shrug it off and go home. But they might cry their eyes out when they are in the comfort of their homes. They are more sensitive than other people because they badly want to feel accepted as they are.
Being a Transwoman Doesn’t Define Them
When men would approach someone and they found out that the person is trans, they generally avoid them. Some of them may be scared of what will happen if someone found out they were in a relationship with them later on. But some of them realize that it doesn’t matter when their dates will know that they are trans. Some always don’t tell straight away. They prefer that the men that they are with would get to know them better first.
Become their Ally
Introduce them clearly to your family and friends. If your date prefers the pronoun her, introduce her as your girlfriend. Correct people who use the wrong pronouns. Ask your partner about whatever they prefer. If they are the closet type, don’t out them as a transwoman. They have the right to keep everything private. You might check with them first to see the people whom they have come out to so that you won’t accidentally tell anyone. It is their story to tell, or not, don’t make any assumptions.
A Final Word
Dating a transwoman is just like dating any other woman. Treat them with respect. Be sensitive to their needs. When they feel that you accept them, you should be ready for a long-lasting relationship and pure love. Aside from these tips, you’ll know more about how to treat your date when you pay close attention to her. If you feel nervous, let them know. Tell them that you see them as a human being who deserves much love and respect.