Normally, everything runs real smooth around these parts with Life in a House of Testosterone. Our weekly posts and link-ups published on time, for the most part, and life generally runs rather smoothly once the boys are back in school and schedules are in place. Unfortunately, life tends to throw a kink in even the best thought-out plan of action and schedules.
We Interrupt this Blog to Bring You Real Life
That has been the case this year. We have had an extremely emotional and trying time – the entire family – and it seems as though it has been one wrench in the system after another. In order for you to understand, I would like to share a few of the reasons why our lives (and this blog) may have seemed scattered the past several months.
Middle School and High School
I have always been a book-worm, loved reading, loved learning, ever since I was a small child. I passed that love along to my eldest child, my daughter, who made honor roll more than she did not, and went on to college. Never assume that all of your children will be the same. My boys, are not the book-worm types. They struggle with most subjects, and I am not one of the best teachers. I am more of a “let me do it for you” teacher than I am a “let me show you how to do it” teacher. My patience is short, something that I need to work on – not them.
My youngest son (age 12) missed passing a few of his 6th grade classes by the skin of his teeth. Another 5 to 10 points more and he would have passed into the 7th grade with no problems. Summer school for four classes (at $300 each) was not an option for us. So he is attending an alternative learning school this year for the first semester and will return to his home school when the second semester begins, with his 6th grade classes finished and caught up on the 7th grade classes so he is in line with the rest of his classmates. He’s doing great so far, bringing in all A’s and B’s on his weekly reports.
My eldest son (age – almost – 16) has hated school since kindergarten. It’s been a constant battle to find ways to get him engaged and interested in what is going on around him. The last nine weeks of school during his freshman year at high school, he was a body in a seat. Nothing more. He refused to do any class work, did not do any of the homework assignments, and refused to take any of the tests. Needless to say, he received straight F’s on his final report card.
There were extenuating circumstances for his school issues last year. So to help him with those, I requested that he be signed up for Virtual Virginia, a completely online learning environment that he could do from home and not have to deal with the issues that he dealt with during freshman year.
We’re failing miserably at that as well. We are four weeks into the course work – he’s taking five different classes – and I am getting phone calls left and right from his teachers indicating that work has not been turned in, assignments have not been completed, he is not participating in discussions and quizzes and tests have been ignored.
His problems stem from the need to read – extensively – while enrolled in Virtual Virginia. He wants to skim, and not read everything. So there are three alternatives.
- He can drop out of school completely, and go to work at a minimum wage at a job he hates.
- He can drop the Virtual Virginia courses and go back to attending class every day at his local high school
- He can be referred to Homebound instruction, where a teacher will come to the house three times a week to give him his assignments and tests and turn them into school
There are other issues he is dealing with, medical problems that developed over the summer, that we are working with him on as well. Quite frankly – for him as well as for me – a new schooling environment and dealing with these new medical issues has overwhelmed us both. We are struggling to find our footing, although it hasn’t been easy over the past three months.
Car Accidents and Weddings
On September 14, my daughter was in a horrible accident. Her Ford Escape overturned when she accidentally ran off the side of the road.
She was extremely lucky to have been able to walk away with nothing more than a few cuts and scraps and plenty of bruises. Thankfully nothing broken, but she was kept in the hospital overnight for observation and I stayed with her – sleeping in a reclining chair off and on – until her fiancé could come back the following morning.
There is nothing like a serious accident to make you take stock of things, to make you realize just what is important and what is not. I was not the only person shaken by her accident. The wedding that she and her fiancé had planned for 2016 was moved up to as soon as humanly possible. Just as I cannot imagine what life would be like without my daughter, neither could her fiancé. So we are preparing for a wedding this month instead of a year from now, and I could not be happier.
Facing Your Own Mortality and Health
My husband has dealt with his fair share of health issues this year as well. A surgery earlier this year to deal with a problem he’s been having for several years did not correct the issue. After several more appointments with a variety of specialists, it was determined that he had a hernia that was causing the issues he was dealing with. So his surgery, just four days after my daughter’s accident, took place finally.
There were complications. A one hour surgery took three hours, and we spent the better part of the day in the hospital for a seemingly uncomplicated surgery. An additional hernia was found, attached to and growing on, his bladder as the first hernia was repaired.
After the surgery, he was in extreme amounts of pain, and we went back to the emergency room two days later. He was unable to walk on his own without the aid of a walker. According to the surgeons, he should have been able to get up and walk on his own – without any help and minimal pain – within 24 hours after the surgery. That just wasn’t happening. A week following surgery; however, his pain has subsided substantially, the incision is looking well, although he still tires easily and is having problems sleeping. Thankfully though the issues that the hernia was causing is now corrected.
Mom … Interrupted
I have my own issues that I’m dealing with – the least of which is attempting to be the glue that holds everyone and everything together. I’ve stayed up for 24-48 hours at a time trying to keep caught up with things, only to crash and burn for two to three days and fall behind yet again. Schedules. Organization. It is what I need to focus on getting my family back on.
A dear friend of mine told me (more than once I might add) that I cannot be there for them if I become sick or fall along the wayside. She’s absolutely right. There are several health concerns of my own that I am dealing with that have not been addressed, things that need to be addressed. I am going to have dental surgery on Wednesday, and I am trying desperately to get things taken care of on this end so that – in the event I am out for a day or two – at least the work that needs to be done is and everything will run smoothly in my absence.
So when you see a weekly featured post is a day or two late being published, or it seems as though I haven’t been able to share my usual witty repertoire with you, please know that it is simply a matter of handling this crazy and chaotic Life in a House of Testosterone and having to choose between the men in my life, and my love of blogging.